I’ve blogged a couple of times about this subject, but here it is again. This must be one of my “Life lessons” that the Universe is trying to get through my thick skull, because it keeps coming up in my life experiences. There are so many times in life where you would be wise to think before heading into “battle”. Even if it’s a cause you champion and strongly believe in, there are always consequences to our actions (or inactions, for that matter). How do you know which is the best course? You don’t, usually. Just do your best and hope you make the right decision.
Is it better to be happy or to be right? I did a blog about this one, too, and came to the conclusion that it was more important to me to be happy. Sometimes, though, it’s not possible to be happy and win the battle. When standing up for your ideals and values, it’s often easy to just see one side (your side) of the equation. Ego is such a strong motivator. Showing compassion and trying to see the other side is recommended if you can do it (I think most people have a hard time doing this)- not from the whole “know thy enemy” standpoint (although that helps, too, of course), but in trying to be objective and understand how an opposite view, even a polar opposite view, can still be valid. You may not agree, you may not like it, but every person’s reality is different, so it should at least be tolerated, if not accepted. And it (the opposite view) should never be dismissed as invalid, especially when it comes to emotionally charged topics. Emotions cloud reason and make it almost impossible to be objective about anything.
I have a dilemma that I’m facing and trying to decide the best course of action. Trying to “choose my battle wisely” as my Gran would have said. The problem I keep running into is that it’s a lose/lose situation for me. There is no getting around that fact. And it has me depressed. If I choose one path, I lose because I don’t stand my ground and stand up for what I truly believe, deep in my gut. If I choose another path, I lose someone who matters the world to me, because I’ll be resented for choosing that path. Love cannot co-exist with resentment. It doesn’t work. Believe me on this, because I’ve lived it.
I could also choose to do nothing, which is a choice, in and of itself. But again, this choice is unpalatable because it leaves me stuck in the same situation. Eventually, something has to give, and the longer I try to ignore it, the worse the break will be when it finally happens.
So – choose your battles wisely. Whether they be big ones or small ones in your everyday life, stop for just a moment and seriously think about and consider the consequences – not just on you and your life, but on others’ lives. Ripples have a way of reaching farther than intended, many times. Which battles can you afford to let go? Which ones will haunt you until they are ‘fought’? If the battle has no tangible rewards, is it worth fighting? Sometimes, unfortunately, the answer is “yes”.
Thanks for reading.